My post today is part of a larger initiative of more than 60 bloggers all sharing their thoughts on how to ‘bridge the gap’.  You can check out the other links at:  www.btgproject.blogspot.com.

Twenty six years ago the issue of gay marriage was on the table for me.  It was my own wedding and I had a gay friend make my dress and a lesbian bridesmaid in my wedding party. My wedding and the need for me to get married to validate my relationship with my then fiancé was an ongoing discussion with the three of us.  Neither of my two friends thought getting married was the right thing to do but they both participated in my wedding and supported my decision.  They wished me the very best and one even sent a bottle of champagne to our honeymoon suite in Florida.  Although I knew they would have preferred I make a different choice, their support, like the support of all my friends, mattered to me.  I was making a vow that would require more than my own determination to make it work. I needed community. And my gay friends were willing to be part of that community even as they questioned my choice.

I understand the desire to declare your commitment to your loved one in a formal ceremony. Whether or not I think it is the right thing doesn’t take away from that. As a Christian I live with that tension.

Flash forward to last week. I was purchasing a gift for my husband for Father’s Day. In a conversation with the sales clerk he mentioned that he had just moved to Toronto from San Francisco. I asked him the stock question, “Was it love or money that brought you here?”  He beamed when he responded, “It was love. I moved here to get married to a very special guy.”  I welcomed him to Canada and then I wished him the very best.  And I do.