Monthly Archives: March 2010

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Alice in Womanland

Watching Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland reminded me of the challenges many women face.  Alice must decide whether to conform to the expectations of society or be herself.
I loved the metaphor of size in this movie.   Initially Alice can’t quite get the ‘size’ issue right. She gets small to get into places and to make herself invisible to threats.  She makes the right choice in the situation given her lack of confidence in being Alice.  She then goes for the larger than life persona.  A little more in your face and certainly worth trying given the situation.

However, as the movie progresses she understands that she doesn’t need to make herself bigger or smaller to be who she is.  At the end
she  slays the real dragon – the box that she is clearly too big to squeeze into. She just needs to be Alice.

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Is it a Wall or a Fence?

In an article called When Teams Can’t Decide published by the Harvard Business Review the author (Bob Frish) discusses testing fences and walls.   In decision making we often get shut down because of the apparent constraints in a situation.  Although the boundaries might be real we can ask the question whether is a wall, which can’t be moved or a fence, which can.

Recently I’ve been in a situation where a boundary has been presented as a wall.  It really is a fence and although it may be difficult to move it I am confident it can be moved.  I’m looking forward to some conversations about walls and fences.  Let’s move the fences!

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MBTI & Difficult Conversations

For years I’ve used the MBTI in my business to help explain differences and preferences in the workplace.    I’ve administered hundreds of the assessments and worked with all types of individuals and teams.

It still surprises me how often we default to our preferences in situations.  My type profile says one of my challenges is “avoid conflict, even when the organization’s performance is suffering.”   Re-reading some material recently on type and leadership has helped me recognize not only some of my own weaknesses and strengths but also those of people I work with.

It provides me with a common language to have a difficult conversation framed in a non-threatening way that recognizes differences and preferences.

It also gives me some insight into how to encourage and support people.

It doesn’t make it easier for this ‘ENFJ’ to confront – it does help me understand what holds me back from saying what needs to be said.