In preparation for a small presentation next week I am looking through a book on communication that I fine very helpful.  You’ve Got To Be Believed to Be Heard has been a valuable resource for me as a speaker and trainer.

Recently it has helped me navigate a challenge in life as well.  Becker writes about communication as selling.  He makes a point that we don’t like to hear: People buy on emotion and justify with fact.  We like to think that we make rational decisions and don’t let our feelings influence us.

If we can accept that we buy based on emotion we might find ourselves less defensive about decisions we’ve made.  Whether we make them based on emotion or facts we still have to live with the consequences.  Just don’t insult me by insisting you made a completely rational, fact based decision.

Our conversations can be focused on resolution and moving forward when we all admit our emotions are in play.  Ultimately our decisions are based on what we want to do.